Maintaining a sense of playfulness in marriage is so important, and the skillful use of humor can be a superpower that helps keep your relationship healthy and vibrant.  In this episode, Rachel talks about three kinds of humor that can pop up in marriage, what function they each have, and how to incorporate more of the the right kinds of humor that bring you closer and keep your friendship going strong.

The World Cup is almost here — and in a lot of households, that means one partner is buzzing with excitement while the other is quietly wondering how long this whole thing lasts. In this episode, Rachel joins forces with her husband Steve (a former college soccer coach and certified soccer obsessive) to address what it really looks like to navigate a big sports season without resentment taking root on either side. Whether you're the sports lover or the spouse who's just trying to hold down the fort, you'll walk away with honest perspective from both sides of the couch — and a practical game plan to work out together before the games begin.

Discovering your husband uses porn can feel like the ground has shifted beneath your feet — and you're not overreacting. In this episode, I sit down with Cori L. Page, licensed IMFT and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, to bring clarity to one of the most painful and disorienting discoveries a wife can face. We talk about why this registers as a genuine breach of trust, how to assess whether use is occasional or compulsive, and why his behavior is not a reflection of your worth. If you're in the middle of this right now, this conversation is for you.

Couples therapy is one of the most powerful tools available to a struggling marriage — but it's not always the right first step. In this episode, I get honest about five situations where jumping into couples work either won't help or can actually make things worse: domestic violence, ongoing infidelity, active addiction, personality disorders, and complex trauma. Each of these is its own kind of "elephant in the room" — something so big it's blocking all the light to the relationship, and it has to be dealt with before any real progress can be made together. If you've been wondering whether what you're facing is more than the everyday kind of hard, this episode will help you name it — and find the right kind of help.

We have such high hopes for marriage — and yet so many of us have been genuinely hurt, confused, or exhausted by it. In this episode, I'm using the biblical framework of Creation, Fall, Redemption, and Consummation to explore the real reason marriage is so hard: not compatibility issues or communication styles, but the comprehensive brokenness that touches every human relationship. The good news is that the story doesn't end there — and neither does this episode. Drawing on Paul David Tripp's What Did You Expect? and Tim Keller's The Meaning of Marriage, I cast a vision for what marriage can actually become when we understand it through the lens of redemption.

Does your marriage ever feel more like a roommate situation than a friendship? In Episode 16 of The Vibrant Marriage Podcast, licensed therapist and relationship coach Rachel Engels unpacks why the slow drift toward the "roommate dynamic" is so common — and what you can do about it without it feeling like a massive overhaul.

Rachel explores four reasons couples lose closeness over time, including the neuroscience of dopamine and oxytocin, the survival-mode trap, the often-unequal burden of relationship maintenance, and the fear of vulnerability. Then she offers four practical, low-stakes ways to start rebuilding friendship and fun in your marriage this week.

When something isn't going well in your marriage, one of the hardest things to figure out is whether to say something, or let it go. Bring it up too quickly and you risk coming across as critical or controlling. Stay silent too long and resentment quietly builds.

So how do you know what's actually worth addressing? In this episode, I'm giving you a framework for exactly that — including the one signal that tells you a conversation can't be skipped.

When the news cycle feels overwhelming, it doesn't just affect your mood — it affects your marriage. In this solo episode, Rachel breaks down why you and your spouse may cope with current events very differently, what emotional dysregulation actually looks like in your relationship, and practical tools to help you stay close even when the world feels chaotic.

Most couples aren't avoiding conversations about their future because they don't care — they're avoiding them because they don't know how to start. Coach Lori Quintero joins Rachel to share why drifting is so easy, how to open the big conversations without creating conflict, and what becomes possible when you and your spouse get truly aligned around your life, your money, and where you're going together.

The empty nest phase is one of the most significant transitions in a marriage — and most of us aren't prepared for what it actually feels like when it arrives. Life coach Kathy Young-Deegan joins Rachel just six months into her own empty nest season to talk honestly about the grief, the unexpected freedom, and the practical strategies that have helped her navigate this chapter well — including what it means for your marriage when the kids are finally gone.

Hard seasons are not fun — and our normal ways of coping often fall flat when the going gets really tough. In this solo episode, Rachel gets personal about some of the most difficult chapters of her own story, and unpacks what she's learned about why hard seasons are not wasted seasons. If you're in the middle of something hard right now, this one is for you.

What happens when caring for someone else becomes an addiction? In this episode, Lisa shares her story of severe codependency — the kind that masquerades as love but is really about control, fear, and an unmet need to feel needed. She holds nothing back, and her honesty just might change the way you see the relationships in your own life.

If you're running on empty and can't remember the last time you actually exhaled, this one's for you. A guided imaginary walk in the woods to help you reset your nervous system — anytime, anywhere you need it.

Anxiety doesn't just affect the person experiencing it — it affects the whole marriage. In this episode, licensed therapist and anxiety specialist Amy DiFrancia joins me to talk about what anxiety actually looks like in relationships, why trying to logic your partner out of it often backfires, and what you can do together to navigate it as a team. Full of practical tools and clinical insight you can actually use.

Your spouse's happiness is not your responsibility — and trying to make it so might be quietly damaging your marriage. In this episode, we unpack how people-pleasing shows up in three unexpected places and what to do instead.

There's a quiet loss that happens for a lot of women after marriage and motherhood. Not dramatic — just gradual. The things that used to light you up, slowly pushed aside by the weight of everything else. This episode is about finding your way back.

Life doesn't slow down just because your marriage needs attention. In this episode, I get real about what it looks like to show up for each other in the most depleting seasons — and share practical, low-bar ways to keep nurturing your team even when you're running on empty.

Every conflict comes back to two core needs: feeling loved and feeling safe. In this episode I break down why your brain works against you in heated moments — and share a four-step clinical framework for getting calm enough to actually move forward together.

Here's a statistic that might surprise you: 69% of the things couples fight about are unsolvable. That's not a reason to panic — it's a reason to change your approach. This episode breaks down why you keep having the same arguments, and what to do about it.

Feeling like you're carrying more than your fair share — and not sure how to change it without starting a fight? This episode breaks down the two mental barriers keeping couples stuck in an unbalanced division of labor, and gives you a practical exercise to start redistributing the load this week.